At the end of Day 5 of the countdown and I have been crying most of the afternoon...
Reason you ask?
I had been experiencing some odd chest pains over the past 3 days and since I am due to fly on Saturday I thought it best to get checked out... Turns out that the doctor wants me to get tested for a blood clot... A WHAT? You say... Yes, an effing blood clot! OK, I head to the pathology lab to have a blood test and away I go, after grabbing a few groceries, I am driving home and then it hits me BAM, like a god damn slap in the face. "What if I do have a clot? Will the doctor let me fly? What if he won't let me fly, what will I do? I can't not go... I have been waiting over FOUR YEARS!" All this went spinning round in my head til I nearly had to pull my car over to the side of the road.
There is no way in hell that I am not going to America... This has been so long in the making... I am flying over to see my best friend, my boyfriend and the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. The universe could not have picked a worse time to have me deal with this crap, I have been so stressed and now the anxiety of the very very long flight (I'm not the best traveller). Ugh!
So after talking to my Ma (twice), and my Da, given myself a headache and talked to my love... I have just had a cup of peppermint tea, some tablets and I am ready to lay down, watch the Vampire Diaries and zonk out... Today made me sad... Tomorrow be nicer to me please!
I miss him!